By Bayo Ogunmupe
This book will also allow you to live by different and personal rules. If you are open, the universe will conspire to bring you the right book at the right time you need it. A friend will suggest a book to you, or it might be sitting on a table at a book fair. Perhaps its cover catches your eye as you walk through your favourite bookshop. Indeed, a book will come across your path when you are ready to meet it; particularly when the wisdom within its pages speaks to a particular problem you are struggling to solve. I am fortunate when a book finds me at just the right time to spell out ways to underscore my values. Good luck happens when you are open to learning new ideas and ready to internalize and implement its wisdom into your life.
The Four Agreements: A Practical guide to Personal Freedom, written by don Miquel Ruiz, is the book that found me just when I needed it. I have internalized its wisdom over the years. It is one of the books in my library I revisit at least once a year to remind me the essentials of living my best life- these four agreements. I think of them often when I need a reminder. Then I wake up early someday to go through it before going to the office. The results from this mindful practice are a more manageable life with self control. The agreements bring me my personal power and get me out of the reaction mode. living in reaction isn't healthy. Nor does it come from a position of strength.
Awareness and mindfulness are the keys to re-conditioning our brains to a place of power. A new mindset changes your perspective. The Four Agreements help you achieve brings a state of bliss which brings you into your power, giving you balance. The First Agreement is: be impeccable with your word. Words have power to lift and destroy. Words are part of your furniture that hang in the air, permeating every part of the room, so utter them with mindfulness. When you speak impeccable language, you speak with integrity; say only what you mean; you don't speak ill of others and you don't speak negatively of yourself. You silence your inner critic and you rid your mind of irrational chatter. By imbibing this agreement, you will experience less negativity in your life. experience less conflict with the people around you.
The second agreement, don't take anything personally; by its practice your life will change. When someone insults you, belittles your talent, this isn't about you. It is about them. You do not have to accept their judgment. By practising this agreement, you accept that other people have their own unique identity and their own reality that you don't have anything to do with. By this acceptance, you recognize that the other person's opinions of you do not necessarily describe you. But the caveat is that this applies to the praises and good stuff they say about you also. Taking things personally means that you agree with what others are accusing you of; and you don't have to. You should choose not to allow it to affect you. Being the only one in control of your thoughts, you should not give it any space in your brain.
Nothing others think or say about you is really about you. Other people see the world with different eyes. Everyone has a different truth. Your truth is different from that of others. The third agreement is that you don't make assumptions. It is a mistake for you to assume you can read everyone's mind accurately. Nine times out of ten you will be wrong; so don't attempt it. Knowing you cannot read minds frees you from unwarranted assumptions. Assumptions cause misunderstanding among people. Instead of assuming, ask. Be ready for the truth when you ask it. Practice healthy communications; it is the key to healthy relationships. The fourth and final agreement is, always do your best. Stop worrying about failure; just do your best. Let go of your past mistakes. Learn to say no to unwarranted requests from others.
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